Why? X2
by Kaibakandy
Summary: A rewrite of 'Why'. What happens when Joey leaves Kaiba with something he'll never forget? And something he'll never leave...
1. Chapter 1

I slammed the door behind me. 'For gods sake…' I muttered under my breath, this day just couldn't get any worse! I'd just come home from the office after a problem came up in the programming of a new video game the company was producing. It was such a simple glitch but it had taken hours to find and correct. On a day like today, when it was hot and humid and didn't look set to change for a while, the office was the last place I wanted to end up, especially straight after such a crap day at school. I inwardly cringed as my mind travelled back to earlier today. It was such a stupid thing, a series of stupid things actually, and they probably meant nothing, but it had bothered me ever since it happened.

I'd just gone to the boys bathroom between classes, as you do, and while I was washing my hands Joey Wheeler, or 'Mutt' as I liked to call him, had come in through the door. I just glanced at him, didn't pay much attention to him, why would I? However, as he went to walk behind me, he managed to brush against me just enough to knock me off balance slightly, not enough for me to stumble or anything, I wasn't that weak! But enough that he felt the need to grab me on the hips and 'stabilise me' whilst saying 'Woah sorry there Seto!'. I was momentarily stunned, not only by the fact he used my first name instead of my surname like he usually did, but by the fact he left his hands on my hips for a few seconds longer than necessary, before smiling at me in the mirror and then going into one of the stalls. I stood there for a few seconds staring after him, before I realised with horror I was blushing! I put my hands on my face and looked at myself in the mirror. Why on earth was I blushing? I turned the tap on and splashed some water on my cheeks to try and cool the increasing hotness that was occurring there. 'Seto what the hell? Control yourself!' I said to myself. It didn't work. I heard Joey flush behind me. I would rather die than him, or anyone for that matter, see me blushing, so I quickly dived back into one of the stalls just as he unlocked the door to his. I listened to him wash his hands and hum to himself as he walked back out the door. My face felt a bit cooler now, but as I went back out I could see I still looked a bit flushed. I heard the bell ring for class. 'Dammit!' I muttered, looked like I'd just have to hope people would think it was down to the hot weather.

As I walked into class, Spanish of all things, I noticed the only free seat was next to the 'Mutt'. I looked around the class again, there must have been another seat somewhere! I sighed as I realised there wasn't. I slowly walked over to the seat. As I did, Joey looked up, smiled again, and pulled the chair out ready for me to sit on. I looked at him suspiciously. What was up with him? Normally he would scowl at me and throw some quip about me being too rich, and he would never smile! I sat down slowly, still glaring at him, wondering when whatever joke he was planning would make itself known. But nothing happened. Once I was sat down, he looked down at his open textbook, and didn't say or do anything as the teacher started the class by greeting us with a cheery 'Hola!'. Maybe he was just having a good day, or trying to wind me up, or both. I shrugged it off and didn't think anymore of it until later on in the class, when the teacher suggested we practice the basic Spanish phrases we had learnt earlier in the year. I groaned inwardly. It was times like this I hated school, it just seemed a waste of time it was so basic. When I was younger, and my stepfather was still alive, he'd insisted on having both me and Mokuba educated at home. For Mokuba it wasn't such a big deal, he was only small and spent of the time playing or colouring, but for me it was a whole different story. I'd have lessons in all the subjects from 8am till 6pm, plus homework, and it was exhausting! However, I'd always get it done, otherwise, ergh! It didn't bear thinking about the consequences that were always threatened towards me if I didn't finish all my work. I shivered slightly at the memory of it. 'You ok?' Joey suddenly asked. Again surprise took over my features as I turned to look at him. Joey asking if I'm ok? What the hell? Seriously? Was he sick? In my surprise I answered quickly 'Yeah..yeah I'm fine..are you?' WHAT? Did I really just say that?!

'Yeah I'm good' he replied, his honey coloured eyes looking back at me with a hint of warmth in them. I must be sick I decided, delusional perhaps, maybe the weather was making me hallucinate, I should go see the doctor. It was not possible that Joey, Mutt, could appear to be being genuinely nice to me, when our usual method of communication was either insults or just plain ignoring each other. I looked down at my book to choose a phrase to recite. As I tried to decide which was the most interesting, seeing as I knew them all already off by heart, Joey suddenly said 'Te Amo'. I couldn't contain myself this time. I snapped round to face him and glared at him.

'What?!' I said.

'Te Amo' he replied, 'It means I love you'

'I know what it means Mutt! Why are you saying it?!'

'It's one of the phrases in the book' he replied holding said book up so I could see it. He pointed at the phrase he had just said, 'See? Right there, I just picked coz it seemed easy to say'.

I sat there with my mouth hanging open and felt a familiar burning creeping into my cheeks. Oh god not now! Not when the Mutt and everyone else could see! I turned away and quickly covered my cheeks with my hands. 'Seto, are you o-' Joey started.

'I'm fine!' I snapped, a little louder than I meant to be. The whole class went silent and looked over at us. I felt the flush spread to the rest of my face. This could NOT be happening. The teacher walked over to our desk and looked at us both. 'Is there a problem here? Seto, are you feeling alright? You look a little flushed, do you need to..' but I was gone. I stood up and despite the stares just walked out of the class. I walked quickly down the hall and went back into the bathroom, where I turned the cold tap on full blast and splashed my face again. I felt the hotness ebbing away when I heard the door open. I didn't need to look to guess who it might be.

'What do you want?' I groaned.

'Geez! I just came to see if you were ok' Joey replied, 'what was up with you back there' he gestured towards the door.

'Nothing, it's just a hot day' I lied.

'Pffft! Yeah right Kaiba, you ain't kidding me, seriously, do you want me to get you anything?'

'I want _you_ to get away from me' I replied glaring at him in the mirror.

Joey just shrugged and pursed his lips before muttering quietly 'Whatever'. He went back to the door and opened it. It was only when I didn't hear it close again that I looked up and realised he was standing there holding it open, looking back at me. He made a gesture as if to say 'Well, are you coming?'. Still not saying anything, but just glaring at him, I grabbed a towel and dried my hands and face before going back out the door and back towards the classroom. I heard his footsteps behind me. I didn't look back but just carried on walking. As we entered the room I could feel the rest of the classes' eyes on us both, so I kept my head down and just sat back in my seat. Thankfully the rest of the class passed without any more events, but as the bell rang at the end and I collected my stuff together and everyone bustled out of the room, Joey leaned over. I almost jumped out of my skin when he touched my arm. I glared at him, but I was ashamed to feel my gaze soften when I realised how caring his expression was. Wait, what!? I pulled my arm away sharply. His honey coloured eyes looked hurt at this. Before he had another chance to say anything to me, I nearly ran out of the room and outside, to where my car was waiting.

Jumping in, I looked back at the school building and saw him coming out, headphones on, not looking like he had a care in the world. 'Ergh!' I said quietly to myself, how could such a low life have had such an effect on me, and why? Must be the weather I concluded. 'Everything ok Mr Kaiba?' the driver said through the intercom.

'Just get me out of here!' I groaned.

….

So….this is the start of something new, but old at the same time. As most of you may have seen on the original 'Why?', I decided to rewrite this story, as life has thrown me many cards over the years, especially in the last 6! A lot of you seem to like the story, and while I am going to do my best to not deviate too far from it, there will be some changes along the way. Please still be honest with me though, I always value my reader's opinions, and do my best to incorporate them into my ideas. I will do my upmost best to keep updating this story on a regular basis, but sadly it may not always be possible. I am no longer a teenager who has oussles of time on their hand to write stories. I'm now a 22 year old university student doing my best to get on in this big bad world. Writing stories like this is my passion though, it helps me unwind and relax from the stresses of everyday life, so hopefully I will be able to keep it up. This story will be a more 'slow cooked' version than the last one too, I want to take time to build up the story, and get to know the characters, and get my ideas together, not rush into anything. Thank you everyone, and thank you to those who still read my stories even in my time of dormancy, and encouraged me to keep writing. I love you all x


	2. Chapter 2

Chapter 2

_As we fell back onto the bed, Joey lips trailed down to my neck. I gasped as he gently nipped, sucked and kissed the skin. I closed my eyes and bit my lip as I tried to hold in a moan. I could feel his hands pulling my shirt up, and then running along my exposed waist. Reaching around I curled one arm around his neck, whilst gripping onto the sheets with my other hand. God this felt good! Joey's hands slowly undid the buttons on my shirt, leaving my pale chest and stomach exposed. He leant back suddenly, and while I let out a whine at the lips leaving me, I turned my head to look at him. I found him looking right back at me with lusty brown eyes. I looked down as he removed his own shirt to reveal smooth bronzed skin, with strong muscles showing beneath. He was beautiful. Once the shirt was gone, I reached up to run my hands along his chest and stomach, feeling the tight muscles tense. I looked back into his eyes to see that his lips had parted as he started to breathe more heavily. He gripped my hands tightly, but not painfully, and as he leant back down he held them on either side of me, restraining me. His lips stopped mere inches from mine, teasing. I tried to lift my head to reach him but he moved just enough so I couldn't. I lay back and looked into his eyes, a small smile playing on my lips. "Joey…" I whispered longingly. I could feel him shudder as the sound of my voice. Not being able to resist anymore, his lips met mine in a passionate kiss, each of us desperate for more of the other. I tried to move my hands back to his body, but his grip was too strong for me to move, and he wasn't about to forego his dominance. I felt Joey move again on top of me and I almost cried out as I felt him rub his crotch against mine. I was already hard, almost uncomfortably so. I could feel through his clothes that Joey felt the same way. I wanted more, so much more, I wanted to feel him inside of me…_

…_.. _

I woke with a jolt, and that annoying feeling when you just want to go back to a dream. In my sleep filled haze, I didn't remember straight away what the dream had been about, just that it had felt reeeally good. Slowly though, it came back to me. 'What the hell!?' I thought to myself. I threw my duvet off and was appalled to see that not only had I been so turned on in the dream, apparently I had been in real life as well. I eased myself out of bed, my unwanted hard on becoming quite uncomfortable. I went into the ensuite attached to my room and slammed the door shut. Why had I had a dream like that? I didn't think of Joey, or anyone for that matter, guy or girl, like that. And him on top? What was that about about? I splashed some cold water on my face in an effort to cool my cheeks down, which had gotten quite red, probably no thanks to the _sickening _dream I'd just had. Looking down, I realised I still had another problem I was going to have to deal with one way or the other. Stripping off, I stepped into the shower, and turned the cold tap on full. 'This should do it' I thought to myself. However, after a good 5 minutes of standing there, shivering and teeth chattering, my 'problem' showed no signs of disappearing. 'For Gods sake' I thought. I turned the hot tap so the water turned warm, feeling flowing back into my body. Looked like there was only one way I was going to solve this. I reached down and grabbed myself. Argh, this felt dirty! I moved my hand slowly to start with. Despite my underlying disgust at myself, I wasn't going to deny, it felt good doing this with the warm water running down my back. As I built up speed, I leant against the side of the shower and bit my lip to stop a moan escaping. I could feel a weight on my stomach as I neared climax. A few seconds later I couldn't help let out a small moan as I finally reached climax and stars formed in my eyes. I closed them as I rode out the waves of pleasure, but these were short lived as in my minds eye I saw him…Joey…. looking at me smirking. My eyes snapped open and he was gone, but the image of him was still in my mind. I growled in disgust. 'Pull yourself together!' I screamed at myself.

Once I was clean and dried, I got dressed, grabbed my school things and stormed out of the house, yelling 'Bye' to Mokuba as I slammed the door shut. I was glad to see it was a clearer day than yesterday, still warm but not so sticky and humid like yesterday. Usually I'd get driven to school, but today I needed some extra time to clear my head before I got there. I walked down the long driveway, through the large front gates, and out onto the street.

Why had I had such a weird- no, disgusting dream? I thought back to yesterday and the way Joey had been acting. He'd been a lot nicer to me than ever before, we usually just communicated through insults. I don't think either of us actually _hated _each other, we were just too proud to admit it. It was odd though, especially at the end of the day, that lookhe gave me. 'Argh, stupid mutt!'. It was probably just some dumb joke between him and the others, see who could wind me up the most. Heck I'd probably get to school and I have Yami or someone touching me up today. Ergh!

I got to school pretty quickly, it didn't take so long if you knew the shortcuts. As I came inside I noticed almost straight away that Joey was standing by the lockers chatting to Yugi. I kept my head down and walked past quickly to the other side. I could hear them laughing about something behind me, but I didn't pay attention. I opened my locker and reached in to get my books. Suddenly though I flinched as I felt a sharp pain in the tip of my finger. "Ouch! Damn papercut!" I groaned, and brought my finger to my mouth to suck on it. The copper taste of blood filled my mouth. I didn't notice it had gone quiet till I suddenly saw in the corner of my eye a familiar mop of blonde hair. I turned around and glared at Joey, who looked concerned. "What?" I said bluntly around my finger. Joey didn't seem fazed by my glare though.

"You ok?" he asked looking at my finger.

"I'm fine" I replied.

Not happy with that answer, Joey reached forward and took my finger from my mouth and brought it closer to his face. I nearly pulled it straight back, but I realised just how bad I was bleeding, how could a simple cut cause so much blood? He inspected it gently and then looked up at me again "This cut looks pretty deep Seto, maybe you should go see the nurse". I shook my head.

"No it's not that bad, just leave it" I replied, pulling my hand away.

"You have some blood on your lips" Joey said. Before I knew what was happening he'd reached up and was running his thumb along my lower lip. I was about to move away, tell him to get off me, but I didn't. I noticed how close he was to me, I could see tiny speck of gold in my eyes. Suddenly the stuff from my dream came back to me, and I was horrified to feel my body reacting down below. 'Shit! Not here!' I shouted internally at myself. I pulled away abruptly and walked away quickly, not looking back. I dived into the bathrooms, into a stall, and waited there till everything was 'back to normal'. I heard the bell go for class, so I left to go back down the hall. Thankfully Joey had gone, so I didn't have to face him again. I tried my best to wash the blood from my hands, but it seemed the cut was actually pretty deep. Grabbing a towel, I wrapped it around the cut, hopefully that'd stop it bleeding.

Wandering into class, History this time, yay, I noticed that somehow, yet again, the _only_ seat left in the class was, you guessed, next to _him. _I scowled as I made my way over. Joey didn't look at me as I sat down. A book was suddenly slammed on the desk in front of me. I glanced up to see the teacher, Ms Adelberg, a scary ass german lady who was almost as tall as me, glaring down. "Why are you late to class Mr Kaiba? Everyone else has managed to be on time" she demanded. I sighed, I _really _couldn't be bothered with this. I was just about to reply with some sarky remark, when suddenly a voice piped up beside me "I forgot to tell you Miss, he was in the infirmary". I turned to Joey and saw he was looking at the teacher, a face of complete seriousness. Ok what was _up_ with this guy? Ms Adelberg glared at him.

"Are you sick Mr Kaiba?" she said, half sarcastically. I sighed again.

"No" I replied through gritted teeth. She was about to say something else but then Joey piped in again.

"He got a nasty cut on his hand" he said, not looking at me but pointing to my hand wrapped in what was now a red soaked towel. I heard someone giggle at the back, but a sharp glare from the teacher shut them up. This woman could almost rival me for glares! Seemingly satisfied, but with slight suspicion still evident on her face, she left us and went to the front of the class to start the lesson. I looked over to Joey. He was busy reading his textbook. "Thanks…" I muttered quietly. He didn't reply but just looked back with a hint of smile, before going back to reading.

Thankfully the rest of the day seemed to pass without any more incidents, or any more of Joey's weird behaviour. That is until it came to going home. I hadn't bothered going to see the nurse in the end, seemed a waste of time. My hand had stopped bleeding, sort of, so I just figured I'd leave it to heal itself. As I collected my things from my locker and went to go out the door, Joey suddenly appeared next to me. I looked at him, not glaring this time, but just wondering what he wanted now. "Hi?" I said.

"I know you didn't get your hand checked out" he stated simply, "Promise me you'll get it seen it to by tomorrow?"

"And why do you care so much?" I replied frowning. I didn't get a response though. He spotted that idiot Tristan and left me and went off to wards him.

Shaking my head slightly, I carried on out of the school gates. What was with this guy? Seriously, it was getting weird. Again I thought about my dream last night. What was up with that? Why had I dreamt of him? Doing that to me? Why?

…

Ok guys, thanks for reading. If you have time please review!


	3. Chapter 3

Chapter 3

A couple of days passed, and still Joey was acting strange. We ended up sitting next to each other in several classes, and I seemed to notice him much more than I normally would. I started to notice things about him too, like how smooth his skin was, how soft his hair looked, how golden his eyes were….- Wait? What!? Thankfully I hadn't had any more dreams like the one the other night….

Walking into school, it was Friday thankfully, I noticed Joey again by his locker, this time talking to Bakura. He didn't look at me, so I just carried on down the hall to the classroom. Spanish again. I sat down at the desk, and a few minutes later, Joey took his place beside me. We were quite happily ignoring each other until it came to 'practice time' where we had to practice saying what we'd just learnt. Turning slowly towards each other, I looked down to the floor trying to avoid his eyes. Despite not having any more dreams like the one the other night, I still remembered it, remembered how it made me feel, whenever I looked directly into his eyes.

"Um…." I stuttered as I tried to think of something to say.

"Sus ojos son hermosos" Joey suddenly said.

Oh no….I could feel my face burning, something in my stomach dropped. Why was he doing this!? I couldn't handle this, this was just too much! For the second time that week, I pushed my chair back and half ran out the class. For gods sake what was wrong with me?! I hated this effect he was having on me! I went down another corridor and ran straight into Tristan, who was acting as hall monitor.

"Argh!" I almost screamed in frustration.

"You ok Seto?" he asked. But I was gone, I needed to get out of here, needed fresh air. I undid my school jacket at the top around my neck, it suddenly felt so tight! Pushing the doors open I stepped out into the heat, wow it was hot…

I took a few deep breathes to steady myself. What had gotten into me? I never, NEVER got affected like this by anything, ever! Sitting down on the steps, I leant forward with my head in my hands and closed my eyes. I started to feel a bit dizzy with the whole thing, and the heat didn't help.

I heard the door open behind me, and I didn't even need to look to see who it was.

"Just go away" I hissed. I _really _didn't want to deal with him right now, I wanted him as far away from me as possible. He didn't say anything but I heard him walk up to and sit down next to me. Oh man he knew how to make me angry!

I took another couple of deep breaths before looking up at him. I was about to throw a glare and tell him to get lost, when I noticed just how close he was…

Before I knew it, I felt soft lips against my mine. Not really knowing what to do… I didn't want to push them away, I knew that much…I closed my eyes and leant into the kiss. I felt a hand cup my cheek and an arm wrap around my neck, and as he guided my face closer to his, I parted my lips and let out a quiet moan…oh god what was I doing?

I pulled away and stared at him in mild horror. Had we just kissed? I looked away and went to stand up when he finally spoke, "Seto, wait, please!".

Looking back at him, I just shrugged "Why?".

He made to hold my hand, but I pulled it away before he could. He just sighed and leant back, looking at me with a forlorn expression. He opened and closed his mouth a couple of times, seemingly lost for words. I groaned, and made to get up again, when suddenly he burst out, "I like you Seto".

I looked over at him in shock. What? "Excuse me?" I replied, frowning. Had he really just said that….?

I could see he was blushing as he looked at his shoes. "I said I like you….a lot…".

I considered him for a while before standing up again and brushing myself off, straightening my shirt. "Well that's the stupidest thing I ever heard" I said with a smirk. I saw him hang his head even further. Some small part of me knew how cruel I was being, it must have taken real courage for him to do this, but I couldn't let my guard down now. Without looking at him, I walked back into the school building and back towards the classroom. My mind kept running over what had happened. I hadn't pulled back straight away, so maybe some part of me wanted him? Wait-no! That couldn't be right! I wasn't gay, was I? I hadn't thought Joey was either, I'd seen him trying to flirt unsuccessfully with Tea enough times. Ergh, whatever it was, I didn't need it right now, I had too much going on in my life.

Stepping back into class, I could feel everyone's eyes on me. I ignored them and just went back to my seat, as if nothing had happened. The teacher just stared at me, but didn't say anything, I think she knew better than to start questioning me in front of everyone. The class carried on, but Joey didn't come back. I tried not to think about what had happened, but it was hard not to. There were so many questions. Why? Why had that just happened?

As the bell signalled the end of class, I stood up to go, but noticed Joey had left all his stuff behind. I knew I should take it with me, it'd be mean to leave it, but at the same time I really didn't want to have to speak to him again. Noticing Yami go past, I spoke to him, "Yami".

He stopped and turned to me with an unreadable expression, "Yes Seto?" he replied. He must have been one of the few who could call me by my first name and it didn't seem weird.

"Do you think you'll see Joey later?" I asked. I held Joey's books in one arm.

"Yes probably" he said, again with no readable expression, just that piercing stare that could be so un-nerving. He reached over and took the books from me. As he went I'm sure I saw a hint of a smirk. "Guessing it didn't go so well huh?".

As he left the room I just stood and watched him go with my mouth hanging open…..he knew about this? Who else knew? Did the whole class know? ARGH! I WAS GOING TO KILL THAT BOY! Marching out of the classroom, I decided I would talk to him again, but only to tell to stay the hell away from me!

The rest of the day passed, and even though we were supposed to share other classes, I didn't see Joey again that day at school. I didn't think too much of it, maybe he'd just got so embarrassed about earlier he'd decided to go home.

Only as I left did I notice Yami staring at me…with a look that said he knew something...Ergh he really could give me the creeps sometimes!

I walked out of the school grounds and turned towards home. I'd walked to and from school every day this week since Tuesday, even though it had been really hot it was nice to enjoy the good weather once in a while, gave me a clear head before the evening's work started…

As I headed through the main part of town, I thought back to earlier again, running over what had happened. So Joey liked me? Fair enough, bit weird, but whatever. But it was my reaction that I couldn't work out. Had I meant to kiss him back? Had I wanted to? Surely not! Gross! As if I'd be seen dead doing that with him….

Coming to the outskirts, I decided to not think anything more about it. It was just a dumbass being well...dumb! As if I'd ever consider being with something like that! I mean was he deluded? Seriously? Ewww!

As I passed an alleyway, I thought I saw something familiar. Stopping for a second, I groaned. It was him, it, mutt, on the floor, sitting half way down crouched on the floor against the wall, caressing a bottle of some form of alcohol. As if he was here right now, just in this exact spot I would walk past. Maybe he planned to wait here, knowing I'd walk past this part of town. What a creep! Or maybe it was just a coincidence…

I made to carry on walking, but something stopped me. I looked at him again. He didn't to have noticed me at all, he seemed to just be staring at the wall opposite, swirling what little alcohol was left around the near empty bottle. Looking more closely, I noticed he looked a bit…well, shit to be honest. His hair was messed up, he had a cut on his cheek, his hands looked messed up, his shirt was torn….he looked like he'd been in a fight. Much as I despised this guy right now, it would be pretty un cool to just leave him here like this, especially in this end of town. If I just checked he was ok, and got him home, that'd be ok, the decent thing to do.

Walking down towards him, he glanced towards me, but didn't say anything. Standing next to him, I looked down. God I could smell the vodka from here, had he really been drinking that neat? "What's going on mutt?" I asked, looking around me to see if anyone else was close by. Seems I was the only one around. When I didn't get a response I looked back at him again. I almost jumped when I saw he was staring right at me, his eyes carrying no emotion, with an almost red tinge to them. The cut on his cheek still looked damp, but most of the blood had dried around it. He really looked like shit! Looking around again, I knelt down in front of him. He still didn't say anything. I rolled my eyes as I groaned "What's going on Joey? Have you been in a fight?". Again, there was no answer. I looked down towards his hands. There were cuts and scratches all over them, as if he'd been punching something hard. Looking back at his eyes he was still just looking at me, no readable expression on his face. Reaching for my pocket, I fished out my phone and went to call my driver. I decided I'd get him to hospital first, get him cleaned up, that gash on his face looked pretty bad. As I went to press the speed dial button, suddenly Joey moved and I felt the hand holding the phone being batted away so that the phone fell to the ground. Frowning I looked back at Joey. I shrugged, "What the hell?". Still he said nothing, but his expression looked slightly amused now. He lifted the bottle and took another swig of the vile smelling liquid. Feeling anger build up inside me I stood up. Brushing myself down, I decided no! I'd call for help but they could come and pick him up, I wasn't staying here with this heap of shit. He could get taken to the scrap yard by himself!

Turning to go, I realised just how far down the alleyway we actually were, it hadn't looked this far down. I took one last look at Joey, who was still just staring at me, before starting to walk back down towards the main street. Idiot! I knew I should have just left him, I could have phoned the police, told them there was a drunk teen on the streets. They could have banged him up and then who'd be laughing. I heard a scuffle behind me. As I started to turn around I heard a smash of glass. It took me a second to register the pain in my head, and the feeling of blood running down my neck, before my world turned black and I feel down to the hard concrete ground…

….

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